Finding A Child Care Provider

The Screening Process

Its important for parents and providers to understand that the screening process is a two way street.  Good parent/provider communications is essential in any childcare relationship.  If that is in place you can work through almost anything that may come up.

In order to understand the process we have to look at it from both the parent and provider point of view.  As we explore the process we will look and see what is happening on both sides of the interview process.

Where do you begin to find someone you feel comfortable with and trust to care for your child? 

Take your time and don't make any quick decisions.  Start by asking friends and relatives, particularly those who have small children and whose child-rearing philosophies are similar to your own.  Ask professionals in the community such as pediatricians, teachers of older siblings, School, your local place of worship, etc.  Some employers have child care referral services or keep a list of area providers, so check with the human resources department at work.  Check your local telephone directory or newspaper listings for a childcare resource center (Rockingham Community Action in Rockingham county NH 603-893-8446) check your local community newspaper for providers who are advertising openings and lastly check the Internet.  The Internet has many free childcare listings for all over the country.

A word of caution about referral agencies, newspapers and Internet listings.  Agencies typically have little, if any, first hand knowledge about a particular provider.  In all cases, most information is obtained from the provider over the telephone or through written correspondence.  Few referral agencies make home visits to the provider to verify the information.  This isn't to say that these still aren't an excellent source for finding great care.  However, you should not assume that the providers on a referral agencys list are the best in town.  The best referrals come from those with first hand knowledge of the provider.  Just keep in mind what works well for one set of parents may not work for another.

Once you have acquired a list of potential childcare providers, its time to start the 4 part screening process.  This process may take a good month to get through so start looking for child care early and don't be caught with just a week to get everything done or you may find yourself looking again in a few month for another provider.

Step One Telephone Screening

You can quickly narrow down your list with just a few phone calls.  Limit your questions to generalities and save the specifics for the home visit.  Try to keep from passing any quick judgments about a particular provider during the phone screening call.  Remember the provider is also interviewing you to see if you will fit in with the dynamics of their families and the program they offer.  Though providers should remain professional at all times, they are only human.  Many work with few adults around if any at all and may be trying to juggle many things at one time to serve the children entrusted to their care while trying to answer your questions.  What may come across, as short and abrupt answers may be the result of a very hectic day.

Start out by asking if this is a good time to get information.  Naptime usually is the best time for most caregivers to discuss at length your questions.

The following is a list of the general things to inquire about during the phone screening process.

«     Location see if its located within the area you are willing to drive to

«     Fees see if they charge a fee within your budget.  Keep in mind that many childcare providers/centers won't give this information over the phone, as they want you to see what you are getting for the fee they are charging.

«     Services provided meals, activities, play time, curriculum, transportation to and from events, etc.

«     Ratio of children to adults

«     Is the center or provider licensed by the state or licensing agency?

«     Availability of outdoor play equipment

«     Does the staff/provider have an advanced degree in Early Childhood Education some college courses, Associates degree in ECE, Bachelors Degree in ECE, Masters Degree in ECE, etc,

«     Also ask any questions that you need answered to even consider doing a visit to the center.

Once you have narrowed the list to a select few (about a dozen or so), who have met your general requirements, try to schedule a home visit with each one with in a weeks time.  Unless a childcare provider doesn't offer a service or price range you are looking for try not to eliminate the provider based on a phone interview.  Some providers may just not interview well over the phone and you may be cheating yourself and your child out of a great loving and caring child care environment. 

Step Two Initial Visit

During the initial home visit try to meet with the childcare provider during a time of day when they are not going to be distracted by the children they care for.  For example before or after hours or at nap time.  Also try to leave your own children at home.  This will give you the opportunity to ask specific questions without worrying about watching your child in new surroundings.  This will also give you and idea of how to prepare your child for what to expect when returning for a second visit.

Step Three Return Visit

By now your list should be growing shorter and you have narrowed it down to ones you would consider placing your child in.  You're ready to have your child make a visit.  On this visit, let your child do most of the work.  Don't expect instant happiness especially if your child has had limited or no exposure to a childcare.  Also when leaving take time to clean up the toys your child has been playing with during the visit.  This small courtesy will leave the childcare provider with a pleasant impression instead of a messy house.

Step Four The Final Decision

Let your child help you make the final decision.  Watch how she/he reacts at each childcare facility during the visits.  Follow your instincts.  Choose the child care facility that best matches your list of criteria and childcare philosophies.  Also take into account your childs reaction to the facilities.  Once you make a decision, call the facility to see if your child will be accepted into that care facility.  Remember the childcare provider was interviewing you as well during this whole process.

The provider has to be sure she/he feels she/he can work with you and your child and that your child will adjust to with the rest of the childcare group.  At this point the hardest part of the childcare searching experience is over.  You just have to make it through the first day.

The First Day

You have just spent weeks, possibly months searching for the right childcare to place your child in.  It's a perfect match and you and your child are excited about the first day.  Your first day usually goes something like this:

You arrive at the childcare and your little one is clinging to your leg like a vine to a wall.  The infant in your hand starts to wail the second you hand her to the childcare provider.  After a heart-wrenching goodbye you head off to work wondering if you are making the right choice.  Even though you called 5 times today and each time received positive reassurance from the childcare provider, you spend most of the day worrying and watching the clock.  When its finally time to leave work you rush to the childcare facility sneak a peak in the window or around the door to find both your children playing happily and don't want to go home.

The first several days or weeks at a new childcare can be the most stressful time for everyone not just the children.  In my 18 years of experience I have found the youngest and oldest children adjust the quickest.  Its the children from 18 mos to 2 ½ years old that seem to have the hardest and longest time adjusting.  They also seem to experience the greatest degree of separation anxiety.  Just keep in mind all children are different and will react to each new situation differently.

Just a few tips to help ease the initial weeks of adjustment:

1.      Give it some time - some children take longer to adjust to new surroundings, people and rules

2.      Prepare your child - make sure your child know in advance they are coming to childcare.  Don't let this be the big surprise for the day

3.      Expect tears and/or rebellion - your child is trying to adjust to a new situation and may exhibit never before seen behaviors.  Usually tears and sad drop offs in the morning don't last more than 10 min.

4.      Trust the provider - you have spent a lot of time and energy into choosing a care giver, if you don't feel the provider is being honest with you then perhaps you need to reconsider your choice. 

5.      Let goodbye be goodbye - When you drop off your child don't drag it out.  The longer you take the harder it is for your child and the provider.  If you make several trips back to check on them before you actually go out the door,  it can be very hard for the children to accept you trust the caregiver.  Conversely, don't sneak out on your child as your child may feel abandoned.  Call the provider once an hour if you want to just don't let a child having seperation issues see you until its time to go home.

6.      Stager Pickup times - Throughout your childs experience, try to occasionally vary your pickup time.  Dont do this expecting to find something negative happening at childcare.  Do this for your own reassurance.

7.      Participate in your childs day - If you have the time, and if it works with your childcare provider, stay for a short while to participate in part in the activities of the children.  If you stop by during story time offer to read a book

8.      Don't be afraid to reconsider If, after a reasonable amount of time, you dont think this arrangement isnt going to work, and then re-think your decision.  It is not necessarily the fault of the childcare provider or the child.  It may be as simple as a personality conflict.  Don't feel you have to find fault.  Assuming that you and the provider have made attempts to try to make things work, give the provider 2 weeks paid notice, thank the provider for her/his efforts and part ways amicably.  By the same token, dont take personal offense if the provider tells you she doesn't think it will be a workable situation its not necessarily anyones fault.  Most providers will enroll all children on a trial basis from 2 weeks to 30 days.  This is to make sure that on a long-term basis all parties are happy with the arrangement.

Home Rules vs. Child Care Rules

 Who decides what will happen?

Everything starts at home!  As a parent you are responsible for all final decisions regarding your childs care and activities.  This does not mean you should call your childcare provider and TELL her/him you have a list of how things should be done at the childcare.  Once you have selected a provider whose child care philosophies are similar to yours, the best thing you can do for your child is to stay informed of the activities and events your child will experiences.  Remember you have taken a lot of time to review the philosophies, rules and the environment of this childcare and it's provider.  You have decided to follow the rules and policies of this facility and have decided to purchase this child care service for your family. 

If there is an activity in which you don't want your child to participate in due to religious, personal, or other reasons, feel free to let your provider know of your needs as she/he may be able to alter an activity.  However, don't expect the provider to change the planned activities or separate your child from the group during this time.  Your child will only see this as a punishment.  Instead if you still find the activity offensive in some way, arrange for other childcare during this time.

Likewise if meals are provided stay informed of what will be served.  If there is something your child can't or won't eat, provide an alternate snack or meal for that day. Something already prepared that the provider doesn't have to cook etc.

Some compromises will be required for your child to "fit into" a childcare setting simply because a child care no matter where it is located is not the same as a mom or dad at home.  It may help to modify the child's home schedule (like nap times & meal times) accordingly, but this alteration at home shouldn't be expected or required by a childcare provider. 

If your child is happy in his/her setting make every effort to work out conflicts between you and the childcare provider.  If you can't come to a compromise, then its time to look for other childcare arrangements. 

Children should know the difference between home and childcare.  Childcare is not a home away from home.  It may have different rules your child is not use to and you will need to help the child care provider by supporting her/his rules when your child is at child care.  With time, your child will come to know, at childcare, you have to clean up your own lunch mess or what ever the rule is.

Over all it is best to be honest with your child care provider in your feelings.  Don't feel like you are offending the provider by bringing up your concerns or desires for the type of care your child is receiving.  Just keep in mind that the provider is not your employee but the owner of a business that is providing you with a service you both have agreed to with your contract.  Both you and your child care provider only want what is best for all the children in the care of the child care center or home.